Ironjolt's posts.


Name:IronJolt

About Me:  

With more commentary than a Saturday afternoon on Sky, and as many metaphors to match, the general election kicked off today. However, the one problem with everybody knowing that election is coming is that they plan meticulously the first few days – where they will go – who they will talk to – what they’ll eat (Gordon likes bananas). And as a result nothing really interesting tends to happen.

However, fear not for two stories did stride through the boredom to be resplendent if ridiculous.

The first is that the proposed cider tax increase of 10% has been ditched and rumours are that to celebrate Nick Clegg donned a crown and drank from two pints of Magners from a goblet for he is the King maker and all shall bow before him.

The second story which jolted my face up from the desk (Face/Jolt/see what I did there?) was PPC Mark Ashweel who thought that all politicians should take a lie detector test in the run up to the election. A lie detector test? Why stop there? I want urine samples, background checks and 24 hours surveillance and the people of Wokingham should do too!

That is all!

Read more »

You’d think that a Tory shadow minister saying that he sympathised with the homophobic religionist B&B owners would be propaganda gold. It has all the elements of a perfect anti-Tory story; a view seen as socially backwards, mass popular feeling going the other way, and a name whch wouldn’t be out of place on the desk of a Bond villain. Yet the Grayling story will fail to be the kind of stuff the Labour party can spinkle on the back of their most recent poster failure, roll up, and smoke their failure away. And that failing will lie in the wobbly spin propogated in the first 12 hours of the story breaking.

First off let’s look at the red corner. Labour rolled out the powerful, and yes homosexual, Mandleson to lead the charge against Grayling. The idea was obvious – let our favourite prince of darkness unleash his demeur, modern and precise performance against the foot in mouth, stuck in the past, un fit to lead Grayling. Yet instead of converting this golden chance, Mandelson looked clumsy, perching on his chair like an incontinent senator and stuglling to defend his position even in the face of weak questioning from Sky News.

Mandelson began with the obvious jabs about the Conservatives having not changed, that if “You turn the camera off and you find that they think and speak quite differently,”. And that was fine, it was delivered with the gusto of a history teacher discussing sea fishing reforms in the doubly landlocked Liechtenstein, but it was solid enough. Except for the use of the phrase “great changes” to describe what Cameron has claimed to do to the Conservatives – the word great just jarred too much and left you thinking – oh what ‘great changes’ are these?

The real trouble however came when he was questioned on the rights of those with religious convictions to turn away from their own homes those who had view with which they disagreed. Instead of launching into a defence based around the liberal democracy within which we are all glad to live, Mandelson began to bark out phrases that have been out of date in law faculties around the world for decades : “The law is the law and one must live within it”.

To find the gaping flaw in this attack one need only to look back to the laws on sodomy which outlawed any sexual acts between two men (or two women) until 1967 in England and Wales. If Mandelson’s attack is taken to its logical conclusion he would be forced to say that any gay man living before 1967 should have repressed his personality and live a lie. This is most likely not the view he holds but is the result of his attack. Law is a reflection of our moral views as a society of which tolerance is one, and any defence of a law musn’t be built simply on pointing to statute but to why we feel it is required.

Flawed too was the attack by the Lib Dems, for whilst they identified that the real issue was not one of legality but one of discrimination and intollerance, Chris Huhne seemed dedicated to repeat the phrase “No gays. No blacks. No Irish.” and variations upon it as frequently as possible. Rather like Simon Foster saying “diarrhea” repeatedly on a radio show in the film “In the Loop”, Chris Huhne won’t be remembered for delivering a precise and eloquent attack on intolerance but rather as the man who reminds us of every discriminatory period we had hoped to move on from.

In short, both parties missed the chance to nail the Torys and take back the momentum. Grayling should have been painted as only paying lipservice to tolerance for homosexuals, as the face of a systemic failure to change within the Conservative party and it should have been stamped upon his head that the whole point of non-discrimination legislation is to eliminate intolerance. And with those three brush strokes they should have gone home. And the failure to do so means that the Conservatives, and perhaps Grayling, will ride out the storm.

Read more »

I blogged the other day about the Labour propaganda machine-gun jamming slightly with tame repetitive blasts against Ashcroft and the ‘class gulf’ between the two major parties. So you can imagine my absolute pleasure when I saw Twitter all a buzz with reports of a new poster which was to be launched by brothers Milliband. Here we go I thought, Labour are set to sear a new hole in the Conservative poll lead and make this thing terrifically interesting.

How wrong I was.

Chopping Cameron’s head onto the face of Gene Hunt, the Labour media gang have managed to take the 80s, a decade where austerity, economic decay and voter anger toiled the Conservatives and find the singular image that near enough the entire nation can look at and think – “oh actually I wish I was in the 80s”.

More than that though. the new Labour ad also manages to ally David Cameron with the can-do, straight talking, working class copper with which the nation have fallen in love.

As a result the ad is not simply a damp squib as the earlier assaults were, oh no, it is positive propaganda for the Conservatives and in particular Dangerous Dave who looked a little weak of late in the face of Brown and Darling’s experience.

Surely with old-hand Campbell back on the scene the Labour cabal could find another image of the 80s that the public could identify with the 80s. Rick Astley anyone?

So what now? Pull the ad, go back to the drawing board and go positive in your ads – as the Conservatives did initially. Wondering quite what those positives should be? I’ll have a think and let you know tomorrow

Read more »

Simplicity is great, I love it. The moon, Catholic priest jokes, Tess Daly – all great. However if you are going to take me on a predictable drive down Class War Avenue helpfully mapped out by a tour guide repeatedly shouting “They all went to Eton and have rich mates” over megaphones taped onto my ears, engage me in some variety.

Please (and by that I mean for the love of God) don’t follow the latest ad in the ever ongoing John Prescott series of “It’s not us doing it but I find it really funny and I will go on Twitter and post it relentlessly through the aid of the interpretor who transcribes my grunts and contradictory statements into words” which fails entirely to deliver on this most simple of requests.

Instead we are treated again to the same Ashcroft snipes in what has become point and laugh trench warfare in the phoney war of pre-electioneering electioneering. Now I’m actually not that pissed off that we’re having a shallow debate on backgrounds, even after Labour gave the whole “This is not going to be a class based election” schtik a few months ago. Its what works. But what does rattle my cage is the laziness of it all. Every single snipe in the video has been made before. We know that Cameron is surrounded by the rich and tax-evading of our society. We know Ashcroft’s tax status was probably dodgy and at best hidden. Tell us something new.

Repeating the same allegations doesn’t make the Conservatives look bad, it makes Labour look under resourced. If Labour want to make this a Class War election, a tactic which isn’t without merit, then show me pictures of Osbourne rimming a swan, of Hague polishing his head with oil in a bath of caviar, don’t run the same Ashbourne allegations for the nth time and expect my head to respond in a novel way.

Read more »

Politics used to be a game played by the rich and powerful in society. The voting club in fact was so small that those running for office could know each of their voters personally by holding a slightly larger than normal tea party. The result was that when considering the ‘public response’ to a certain action, politicians just needed to wonder what the chaps down the Club would think of their decisions. And knowing that most of those chaps went to school with them and were from the same class, it was quite obvious that they’d be more or less happy without ever the top dog came up with. Hence those that got elected could do what they thought was best and more or less just get on with it.

Now however, the town of Grimsby has the right to vote and politicians have to weigh up every decision with that beast known as ‘public opinion’ that crosses lines of race, religion and class. Unfortunately if there is anything we know about the public at large it is that we are fairly stupid. For a third of the time we’re asleep, quite often we are drunk, very often we close doors on our hands and at least once a day we’ll use the phrase ‘I reckon’.

On top of this trifle of ineptitude there is also the sledgehammer that is the public’s lack of education as regards economics, political theory, notions of justice and seemingly the ability to think more than two steps into a puzzle. Read the rest of this entry »

Read more »

Those of you who have the ability to scroll down or the loyalty to visit this site more than once will have noticed that RedJolt doesn’t like the people who want a ‘dislike’ button on facebook. He is wrong.

I mean am I the only one who begins to shake with mouth frothing hatred when I see a ‘4 mre sleeps’ status update from some Paris Hilton wannabe who can’t wait to get back to see her innate boyfriend and presumably swap mind numbing pleasantries before dropping pants, bending over and thinking of En-ger-land?

Currently when I see such banality I can’t really respond with a ‘comment’ as otherwise I’d spend my life doing nothing else, and nor can I ‘like’ it with a healthy dose of sarcasm because apparently the internet cannot convey such elaborate sentiments. Hence I have to leave it there, existing without being mocked or challenged and that is something I cannot stand for. It’s like leaving a turd unflushed or a Morris Dancer alive – unacceptable. For some of you out there this might have been a bit strong and you are now slightly upset because you make such lovey comments now and again; well, first – never do that again and second, consider the other applications of the dislike button.

Nick ‘Dreaming of a White Christmas’ Griffin has a facebook page. He makes posts on it. He claims to be democratically supported by newts, pitbulls and inbreds across the nation. Now imagine his reaction when not only everybody in the UK but everybody in the right thinking world ‘disliked’ his status. Okay, so it might not stop him beating his drum of division but it would send an incredibly strong message of opposition to the view BNP and a message of support to those who they attack. And, more importantly, it would feel rather nice.

Obviously a dislike button isn’t a perfect system, the chances for bullying and abuse are massive but shiiiiiiiit Facebook I want one and I want one now.

Read more »