Do you see what you’ve fucking done, you stupid cunts?
Between you you’ve not only managed to ignore what I fucking told you to do, you’ve also managed to take a man who is 80% meringue-based dessert and 20% mutated fucking gila monster, a man with an ego the size of a small to medium sized galaxy, a man whose idea of relating to the voters is just to string together a fucking random selection of words his communications officer heard on fucking skins and blurt them in no particular order interposed with the word ‘guys’ at random intervals at kids who have all the mental dexterity of a nematode worm in a persistent vegetative state, and then fucking vote for this cunt in a general election. And you thought this was a good fucking idea?
Oh, I’m sure you’ve all got your fucking excuses. “Ooh, I didn’t want Labour to get back in.” “Ooh, I didn’t want to vote Lib Dem because it would have been a wasted vote.” “Ooh, I’m a colossal fuckhead who doesn’t deserve the right of representation in any country with more than one political party and doesn’t understand the slightest fucking aspect of electoral process, but decided to vote because despicable programmes like Britain’s Got Fuck All Talent and despicable cunts like Simon Fucking Cowell have convinced me that it’s cool.” You know what? FUCK YOU ALL.
I don’t care if it is a fucking hung parliament. Right now, Nick Clegg is in talks with the conservative party about forming an alliance government. Well THERE’S a fucking rosy future for us all. A country ruled by a combination of a cunt and someone nobody voted for because he might not have won, which, as a statement of logic is up there with “I don’t like this programme, or the thing that’s on after it, but I’m not going to change the channel because the batteries in the remote might have run out”.
The entire thing is a massive clusterfuck of Wagnerian proportions, and I just don’t care anymore. If you want to live in a country ruled by a 43 year old man-child who probably only gave up the teat because his mummy was too busy giving pointless interviews about her son, then so be fucking it. But don’t come crying to me when it’s all gone wrong, which I anticipate should come some time within the next 3 months.
To close, I’m going to call on my muse, Mr. Spider Jerusalem, to sum up voting.
“You want to know about voting? I’m here to tell you about voting. Imagine you’re locked in a huge underground nightclub filled with sinners, whores, freaks and unnameable things that rape pit bulls for fun. And you ain’t allowed out until you all vote on what you’re going to do tonight. YOU like to put your feet up and watch “Republican Party Reservation”. THEY like to have sex with normal people using knives, guns and brand new sexual organs that you did not know existed. So you vote for television, and everyone else, as far as your eye can see, votes to fuck you with switchblades. That’s voting. You’re welcome.”
well FUCKING said